1 Corinthians 7:32-35 (NRSV) – “I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to please the Lord; but the married man is anxious about the affairs of the world, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried woman and the virgin are anxious about the affairs of the Lord, so that they may be holy in body and spirit; but the married woman is anxious about the affairs of the world, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to put any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and unhindered devotion to the Lord.”
Why does Paul assume that married people are anxious? And why would he want for people to be “anxious” about the Lord? After all, Paul writes in Philippians 4:6 (NRSV), “Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” According to Strong’s Concordance, the word “worry” in this passage is the same Greek word underlying the word “anxious” in the passage from 1 Corinthians.
Well, in reality, people are anxious. On one hand, you can choose to trust God to deal with a situation instead of consciously entertaining worry about it. That does not necessarily mean, however, that there will not be some undercurrent of anxiousness running through your mind. Even while trusting in God, you are still trying to be responsible and diligent, and these efforts can cause a feeling of anxiousness even if you know that ultimately God has the situation worked out.
Believers want to please God, even though they may not be able to escape some degree of concern over whether they are doing everything they should. We see different sides of ourselves and can get anxious about how the different aspects of ourselves line up with God’s will. Likewise, married people, no matter how well they may generally get along, will always have some differences with their spouse, and to some degree, figuring out how to meet each other’s desires in spite of these differences can be a source of anxiousness.
Some Christians make a big point of saying that being a Christian is not easy. They seem to have a great fear of Christians becoming comfortable and complacent, so they take it upon themselves to knock responsibility and an urge for action into them.
But what I say is, why do you fear Christians becoming too comfortable? Believers have a new nature that wants to please God despite being in a body and mind with frustrating limitations. That makes life hard enough. Why do you feel you must make it harder?
So, basically, what Paul is saying to those considering marriage is, “You are already experiencing some inherent tension that comes with being a believer; are you sure you want to bring another person into the picture, and then have to maneuver through life amid both the tension as a believer and the tension as a spouse?”
Now as I have described in previous posts, there can be a deep sense of fulfillment that comes through marriage. Likewise, there is a very deep sense of fulfillment that comes from being a believer. For some, being married may result in a greater sense of peace in life, because of certain desires that can be met, and for you and your spouse to be able to support each other as you live for God. Paul is perfectly understanding of this, which is why he never tells people not to get married. He just seeks to give people something to think about before jumping into marriage too hastily.